If you find the title of the article a bit odd, it is a response to (and somewhat a parody of) an article posted by CovenantEyes blogger, Jessica Harris. In it, she mercilessly beats down several strawman arguments with the ferocity of an NFL linebacker. Her article is entitled, “Five Reasons Purity Rings an Pledges Don’t Work.” To demonstrate the absurdity of her criticisms of a program that has helped countless teens uphold the biblical mandate of sexual purity, I have substituted the concepts of the purity ring and purity pledge with the marriage ring and wedding vows.
1. Marriage Is A Heart Choice
With the emphasis placed on adultery avoidance, the wedding ring might as well be renamed to the no-cheating ring. When men place themselves in precarious situations, they think they can just glance down at that little round thing on their left ring finger and “snap out of it.” Wrong. Marriage is about the heart; therefore, wedding rings don’t work.
2. Marriage Requires God’s Strength
Since cheating involves physical interactions with others, it can be accomplished through sheer girt, determination, etc. People have obviously forgotten about relying on God’s strength for remaining faithful; therefore, marriage ceremonies don’t work.
3. Marriage Is Not A One-Time Choice
Marriage is an important decision, but it’s also a daily decision. People obviously do not realize the seriousness of the wedding commitment; therefore, wedding vows don’t work.
4. Marriage Is Ultimately Their Decision
We can be guilty of arranging marriages without regard to the couples who must ultimately make that decision and commitment. Parents drag kids down the aisle kicking and screaming and force ignorant adolescents into betrothal; therefore, marriage ceremonies don’t work.
5. Marriage Is A Lifestyle, Not Simply A Part of Your Life
It’s a cultural thing. You’re supposed to graduate high school and college and then get married. People have treated marriage as a status symbol; therefore, wedding vows don’t work.
Let’s be clear. CovenantEyes has a great thing going on. It helps couples deal with (and overcome) the very real issues of pornography addiction. I have no doubt that Ms. Harris has plenty to offer to youth and young adults concerning the topic of purity. Her arguments fall flat when she dismisses the True Love Waits program in its entirety based solely on her own personal experience. If Ms. Harris has empirical evidence offer that shows this program to be wholly ineffective, then by all means, she ought to bring this evidence to light. But all she has is weak anecdotal evidence which leads to huge logical holes in all of her assertions.
Do you have a personal story about how the True Love Waits program has helped or hindered your goal of being sexually pure until marriage (and beyond)? Share in the comments section below.